Mercenaries hired by the Society's executive committee last Friday to aid in a "Fund-raising operation" have just informed me that their raid on the office of the Treasury, 112 Carnegie Hall, University of the South, has been a success. According to their calculations, over two-thousand American dollars' worth of solid gold bars, platinum records, silver spittoons and alma rodochrosites were pillaged from the building as it smoldered on the quad. As Patrician and Fellow-in-good-standing in the Society, I hereby annex these funds in the name of the Naturale History Society. Our pockets are now full, friends, and we will soon reap the benefits of our present loadedness. First on the adgenda will be the acquisition of a noble wooden trunk to serve as the Society's Canopus. If you have any information that may lead to the apprehension of such, please report to the Patrician's office, 114 Morgan's Steep Road, as soon as possible so we can go buy the bastard. Applications or supplications for the allocation of funds from the Society's now cavernous and overflowing vaults of sheer opulence may be obtained from and made to the Patrician.
ALSO: do not neglect to remember not to forget to attend the imminent post-meridial OWL RECONNISANCE excursion tonight at Morgan's Steep. We will ply that cavernous black for members of the Strigidae and will engage, by way of digital recording and subsequent broadcast, in auditory ping-pong with same. Please plan to rendezvous with E.M. Iralu, Viceroy and A. Lange, Curator, tonight at 8:30 for maximum satisfaction. I suggest you bring a luminous electrochemically powered photonic projection device or night-vision goggles, which we will probably soon be providing to all members along with hovercrafts.
Ensconced in silken riches,
B.L. Padgett, esq., Patrician.
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